I haven’t posted this year and it’s probably because, up until now, I didn’t know what I’d say. I promised to stop talking about a boy and I wasn’t sure it was possible to do that and therefore I’d be going back on my promise. I just realised that I can talk about how I feel without it being wrapped up in a cocoon of him.
As I sit on my uni bedroom floor and listen to Ed Sheeran’s ‘Kiss me’, it dawns upon me that for the past four or so years, I have been stuck. And I have experienced something that not everyone gets to- believe it or not, I fell in love. It’s bizarre to think that at only 18 and 3/4 of a year, I have experienced that deep and all important feeling. But I just know. And I count myself lucky for it.
As I close that chapter of my life, say goodbye to that almost-relationship, I can only smile at the really good memories, cringe at the really bad ones and come to a state of acceptance that the past is just that. I can’t drag it any further into this year or my life. I’m a firm believer in everything happening for a reason and everything happening in my life is leading up to something bigger and better and more beautiful.
I want whoever’s reading to feel this way too. I’m currently teaching myself to fall out of love but in such a way that I’m landing on my two feet and coming out better for it. The past is a nice place to visit but a bad place to say, as the saying (I think) goes. So be thankful for what you did get to experience, close the door, turn around and believe there are better things ahead.
There just has to be.
Happy new year, lovely people.